Mike and Aaron's Christmas Banana

To celebrate the launch of this, my new blog, I've decided to give you all a present, and upload my Christmas album, "Mike and Aaron's Christmas Banana", available online for the first time ever!

Comprised of Aaron Marshall and Michael Barkley, "Aaron and Mike's Christmas Bananaband" existed for just one short afternoon in the winter of 2008. Many agree this was for the best. There have been further musical collaborations between the pair before and since, but none so worthy as to wear the Bananaband name. The exact origins of how this moniker was decided upon have been lost to the mists of time: a seemingly unsolvable mystery, given that bananas do not feature heavily, or indeed at all, in the bands oeuvre.

The album itself is a meagre 16 minutes 41 seconds long, although most listeners agree this is much too long. It is the perfect antidote to the saccharine overproduced festive songs often heard this time of year. Some might say it fulfils this role too well, and is actually an unlistenable mess, a hideous repetitive smorgasbord of disgust and despair that barely qualifies as music. This makes it an ideal gift for friends and family.

Feel free to listen online, download, or perhaps just burn it to a CD and put it on loop to scare away the cats from your garden.



Liner Notes

01 - Christmas Warning

So often, once we grow up, Christmas loses that magical edge, and can sneak up on us without warning, much like other holidays such as May Day, Hanukkah, or the birthday of a loved one. Christmas Warning seeks to remedy this. This is your Christmas Warning. Christmas is approaching. You have no excuse now. The alarm-like synthesizers reinforce the symbolic theme, whilst the irregular melody on the ukulele represents the unknowable nature of the future: Christmas is approaching, but who knows exactly what it will hold in store.


02 - Yule Log

The laughter of children; a cheery folk tune beside the rustle of a roaring fire, this track is the personification of all that a classic Christmas has come to mean.


03 - Funky Christmas

What would Christmas be without a party? The funky bass line itself however is taken from the game "Toejam and Earl 2 in Panic on Funkotron" for Sega Mega Drive, so whilst at first glance the party may seem like a social occasion it is not. The child is playing videogames, the parents are elsewhere: technology has caused a total breakdown of the traditional family unit, even at during Christmas, when it is supposed to be strongest.


04 - Rudolph the Rattlenosed Dolphin

Waiting for Santa can be a stressful experience, even the smallest noise can be misinterpreted. The child drums impatiently, trying to sleep, but also ready to scream, before finally dropping off to sleep.


05 - Christmas is Coming

The insane delirium of pre-Christmas sleep, as the minutes tick by, tortuously slowly. Will it live up to expectations? Only time will tell.


06 - Christmas Surroundings

Christmas morning, and the dream becomes real. Life is a blurry haze, everything is familiar yet foreign, like a visitation to an alien planet. Has the intruder left presents? There is excitement, but also unease. The impatience returns. Finally, the presents are opened.


07 - Missing Christmas

The camera is set up. The presents are opened. The camera was not on. The moment is lost forever.


08 - Jazzy Christmas

The stress over, now the fun can begin. A mixture of traditional themes and individual variation highlight how each Christmas is unique, whilst still retaining some core elements from year to year.


09 - Medieval Christmas

Christmas fatigue has worn in. Relatives must be visited. The drudgery of commitments looms near. Efforts are made to be festive, but they are too little to lift the mood.


10 - Christmas is Coming

Christmas may be over, but boxing day is still to come. There is still turkey. The decorations are still up. Christmas is not yet over. Christmas is coming again.


11 - ELP Christmas

A sped up version of yesterdays fun. Everything must be crammed in. It is no longer enjoyable, just going through the motions.


12 - Christmas Holiday

Finally a chance to relax, put the feet up, and do nothing. Christmas is finally over, thank goodness.


Note: the above liner notes have been fabricated after the fact. No care was taken to include any kind of symbolism in the album, it was merely a collection of random sounds in a random order. The above descriptions were an experiment by me to see if I could come up with a pseudo-plausible sounding reason for the madness, much like reading too much into modern art. You can judge for yourself how well I've done.